Friday, August 7, 2015

My thoughts on a blog post I read on Huff Post...."17 Ways Divorce Changes You For The Better".

I really enjoy Huff Post.  You can fine articles on just about every subject imaginable.  I was reading one on the Huff Post Divorce site ...

by Brittany Wong
I enjoyed the article.  I will share just a few of her 17 ways, some of the ones that hold true in my situation.

**"It truly forced me to stop being someone I'm not in order to make someone else happy. Because of divorce, I'm now focused on just being the best version of me I can be." **
In the beginning of my transition that was not my way of thinking, the pain was too intense.  Now I am beginning to think that way and it makes me happy.
 **"I now recognize that there's no room in my life for that kind of pain anymore. I no longer need to explain myself to my ex-husband.** 
What an unexpected gift.  Peace:-)
"Divorce has made me a more confident, wiser, empathetic and empowered person........"
Amen to that one!
**"Divorce taught me that I can fix, repair, install and put back together just about any appliance or piece of furniture in my home. **
That's not entirely true in my case.  But I do have the ability to ask for help and I am not afraid to so just that.
**"I always give people an opportunity to be honest and speak their mind. I never want to be blindsided again."** 
And boy was I  blindsided.  When I learned the truth I was shocked.  I am sure there is more truth to be discovered but I no longer worry about that. As a friend once said about my X after he learned the truth behind the facade..."The scales fell from my eyes".  Believe me it is an extremely painful process.  

"I learned what I will and won't accept from those in my life. I never allow myself to be treated like I'm not important again." 
It is in looking back I  can see clearly how I was treated.  Promises broken, dreams put on hold, I was never quite good enough.  I am glad I can now feel good about myself.  I am happy.
I can't water this process down and tell you it is an easy process.  It is gut wrenching.  Unbelievably painful.  But Hold On!!!  You can make it.  One day at a time and each day gets better although it is a roller coaster and a slow process.  It has been 2 years for me and I am still in the process.   Don't let anyone tell you there is a time frame.  There is not.  
Hold unto your faith your family and your friends.
God Bless You
Prayers and hugs
KathieyV:-)

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