Divorce Recovery Book Club:"Chicken Soup for the Soul Divorce and Recovery" Chapter 4

 Those of us who have been through or are going through a divorce know the pain it can cause.  In some way, I think we understand each other, although the discomfort and length of recovery levels vary in each individual.   With that in mind and considering we all have something in common, I thought I would start a book club, "The Divorce Recovery Book Club." I will love it if you read the book with me.  

I have found you can tell your story when you read others' stories.  You can write about how you feel about what you read and note how their story initiates an emotional response in you or brings up a memory of your personal story.  You should journal the thoughts, emotions, memories, and prayers that come to your mind as you read.  You may also come across ways to move forward that you can incorporate into your life. So, by all means, start a journal.  I will put my journal entries in italics after the comments on the author's story.

My YouTube Version

Chicken Soup for the Soul/Divorce and Recovery

Chapter 4

The Gut Speaks

I have come to realize over the years that we need to listen to our gut.  If I had listened to my gut, I would not be where I am today.  Let's look at Chapter four and see what Angela Chiaro, the author of this story, has to say.

This chapter starts off with a quote...

She starts by talking about her parents, who were married for 37 years. Coming from a strong Catholic family that took marriage seriously, she did not see herself traveling down the road to divorce, but it happened.

She talks about the relationship with her husband as being toxic even before they were married, but she ignored the signs.  In other words, she did not listen to her gut and married him despite the red flags. 

Soon into her marriage, she became a shell of her former self.  She no longer had dreams of her own, and it seemed the world revolved around his wants and needs. She finally did leave, but not without scars.  She was filled with feelings of failure and shame.  

I, too, had gut feelings but ignored them, convincing myself it was just my imagination.  But now I know that it is crucial to listen to your gut and don't dismiss something as false when it may be true. I don't have feelings of guilt related to my divorce because I did not want the divorce. I felt no shame or failure because I was willing to fight for the marriage, but as you know, it takes two.

Angela was able to move on after her painful divorce. Counseling and journaling were a big help for her.

How do you feel about this chapter? Can you relate to Angela's story?

I hope you are journaling as you go through this process. Here are a few journal prompts to get you started in expressing your thoughts.

Journal Prompts

*How long were your parents married?  Did they stay together?  How would you describe their relationship?

*In your relationship, did you listen to your gut?  Write about how you did or did not listen to that inner voice.

*Did you lose yourself in your marriage?  Were your goals and dreams looked upon as unimportant?

*Did you feel shame or guilt related to your divorce?  If so, why, and if not, why not?

*If you had listened to your gut, would you have married your husband?  If not before marriage, when did that voice in your head tell you that something was wrong?

Please comment if you would like to share your thoughts.

God Bless You on Your Journey!

KathieyV