You Can’t Afford Not to Fight: Funding Your Divorce When the Money Is Gone

 

You Can’t Afford Not to Fight: Funding Your Divorce When the Money Is Gone

When my husband left, I discovered he had been quietly moving money into a personal account I knew nothing about. The only money I had was an inheritance from my parents, and he had been draining that without my knowledge. What little remained became the only reason I could afford to fight, and without it I would have walked away with nothing. No settlement. No alimony. No justice. Just nothing. I was afraid, and I did not know my options. What I did not realize then is that options existed. More options than I ever knew.

I have talked to so many women who were in the same position. Women who spent decades building a home, raising children, and supporting a family, only to find themselves with no personal income, no money in their own name, and no idea how they were going to pay for a divorce attorney. I spoke with one woman in her 70s whose husband left her with almost nothing. She talked about the very real fear of becoming homeless. Not as a worst-case scenario. As a genuine possibility staring her in the face. Without the ability to fund a divorce, she had no way to fight for what she had spent a lifetime building.

Here is the part that nobody talks about enough.

The outcome of your divorce is not just determined by the facts of your marriage. It is determined, in large part, by your ability to pay for the process. When you cannot afford an attorney, you cannot fight. And when you cannot fight, you walk away from what you deserve. That is not fair. But it is true. And pretending otherwise does not help anyone.

The women I have spoken with are not weak. They are not uninformed. They are not to blame for the financial position they find themselves in. Many of them spent years, sometimes decades, in marriages where their spouse was the primary earner. They built their lives around a partnership that was supposed to last. When that partnership ended, often without warning, they were left financially exposed at the exact moment they needed resources the most.

Every woman deserves the ability to fight for what she has earned. Financial barriers should never determine the outcome of a divorce.

That belief is why I am writing this series.

Over the coming weeks I am going to break down every possible way to fund a divorce, one option at a time. From divorce loans and attorney payment plans, to court orders that can require your spouse to cover legal costs, to legal aid programs and pro bono options for those in the most difficult situations. We are going to look at each one honestly, including who it works for, what the limitations are, and what you need to know before you pursue it.

You should not have to choose between affording your life and fighting for it.

Stay with me. The next post in this series starts with one of the most misunderstood options available: the divorce loan. What it is, how it works, and whether it might be right for you.

You deserve to know your options. All of them.

God Bless You on this Journey.

KathieyV