Friday, April 10, 2015

Guest Posts, Reasons for Divorce, (with my thoughts in red) As Found on the Web….

"Divorce was not meant to be a part of the Christian life (Matthew 19:8, 9).  Many today are divorcing their spouse for reasons other then infidelity and that is wrong.  Plain and simple, God hates divorce!  I believe it is the number one cancer in America today."

Terry Malone 
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I personally believe there are reasons for divorce though.  Such infidelity, immorality, and abuse.
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The Moment I Knew: Readers Share Their Divorce Stories 
From Huff Post
Was there a moment you knew your marriage was over? The split-second you saw the writing on the wall--even if you didn't acknowledge as much until later?
"when he spent our daughters entire birthday party on his phone and my father said to me "ditch this guy" (I can relate to that a bit.  We were on a family vacation that I had dreamt about for years.  Joe spent hours on his phone.  Said he was on work related calls.) 
(That was in April.  I got blindsided in early June that he was planning to leave me)

"When he made me feel crazy for being unhappy with his inappropriate friendship with another woman at work" (This happened to me too.  I would find out later, from someone closely involved,  that what I had suspected was in fact true )
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More Crazy Reasons People Divorced  From Huff Post….

1. He didn't like the movie "Frozen." 
2. She was possessed by a genie.
7. She adopted 550 cats.112666020
One man divorced his wife after she brought over 550 cats into their home, according to the Times of Israel. He told court officials that he was unable to sleep on his bed, which was covered in cats, and unable to eat a meal because cats jumped on the table and stole his food. The couple attempted to reconcile but divorced after the woman refused to give up her pets. (This is a tough one.  I know I could not live with 550 cats.  She needed counseling.  She could do what my daughter wanted to do when she was younger.  Build a pet center in a building in the back yard.  She could even put a bed out there to sleep with her cats when ever she wanted:-)
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Boy meets girl. Boy marries girl. Girl gives boy a kidney. Boy leaves girl and -- surprise, surprise -- girl wants kidney back.That's the story one U.K. woman recently shared with newspaper the Sunday People, explaining how she donated the vital organ to her dying husband, only to have him leave her once he recovered. 
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Worst Reasons to Get Divorced by Cathy Meyer

 **He No Longer Makes me Happy**

Ladies/Men, it isn’t your husband’s job to make you happy. That is your responsibility entirely….


**You're Bored With The Marriage**

Boredom is not reason to divorce. It is a great reason to kick things up a notch, to find fun and interesting things to do together. 

**You've Grown Apart**

This is a normal occurrence in most marriages. With life and all that comes along with living daily life I would be surprised if most couples didn’t feel they had grown apart or felt detached from each other.
There is a simple solution for this problem, find more time for each other. 


From Psychology Today by Thomas Plante

Is the "Mid-Life Crisis" an Excuse for Men Behaving Badly?

Could narcissism and poor impulse control be behind the "mid-life crisis?

"While there really are never simple answers to human behavior and complex individual differences are so often the norm rather than the exception, typically this mid-life behavior is a byproduct of Narcissistic tendencies (i.e., "It's about what I want and my needs") along with poor impulse control. Successful men in particular with many resources may feel that they are entitled to more in life that includes a variety of narcissistic fantasies and impulses. Rather than blaming their behavior on character and behavioral flaws in themselves it may be easier to attribute their behavior to a mid-life crisis as if it was some caught disease.
So, don't blame men behaving badly on the mid-life crisis. Consider blaming the behavior on the person engaged in the behavior. While they may feel entitled to fulfilling fantasies and desires with little regard to others they do so with consequences including the best interests of their spouses, children, and maybe even themselves too.
"Sometimes doing the right thing means putting on your man pants, taking responsibility, and controling impulses and desires that are destructive and harmful to those you have committed your life to. "
Thomas Plante
Amen to that Thomas!
KathieyV:-)


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