Saturday, March 14, 2015

"It Takes Two and Other Nonsence" by Donna Hayden

I found a great website called With Every Step by Donna Hayden. I found an article on the site called "It takes two and other nonsense".  Here is quote I can relate to…

Do not tell me divorce takes two! I don’t care what the reason for the divorce - it very often only takes one. The other has no say. There are always two sides to every story, but it definitely does not take two. It takes two to get married as you have to say “yes” and “I do,” but divorce only takes one person. The judge does not ask if both parties agree as it does not matter.

Yes, I can relate to that statement. It only took one to make the decision to leave. To make the decision to disregard any attempt at counseling. To throw away our vows to God as thought they were meaningless. I was willing to do anything to save our marriage. It does, as Donna says, "very often only takes one. The other has no say." Yes I can relate to that.

She goes on to talk about the things not to do or say to those of us going through this unwanted life change. Then she tells us what you should do for a friend going through this….

Do let me cry on your shoulder.

Do encourage me to find myself.

Do encourage me to find inner happiness.

Do remain my true friend.

Do check on me from time to time.

Do continue to invite me to outings, even if I decline 100 times.

Do be a good listener, sometimes we just need to vent.

Please, if you were friends with both of us, remain friends with both of us. 
 Just keep our lives separate.


Do say  "Come hang out. I'm not taking no for an answer." 
 I didn't really feel like dressing up and going out. It was nice to just 
“be” with a friend that made time for me .

Great advice. You can check out her article here .
Remember to hold onto your faith and your friends.
Hang in there!

KathieyV:-)





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